Recipe: Chicken Schnitzel

I hate chicken breast. Hate it. It’s dry, it smells funny, but it’s good for you. Here is a recipe that makes it not so good for you. But it is delicious.


  • 2 boneless skinless chicken breasts
  • 1 large egg
  • 1/2 cup flour
  • 1 cup panko
  • 1 tbs paprika
  • 2 tbs oil
  • Salt to taste


  • A heavy board
  • Meat tenderizer
  • Fry pan
  • Tongs
  • Bowl
  • 2 plates


  1. Beat the crap out of the chicken with the meat tenderizer, making sure it is all the same thickness. Use the heavy board to protect your counters.
  2. Beat the egg in a bowl. Spread the flour with paprika mixed in out on a plate. Spread panko out on your second plate.
  3. Dust each side of the chicken with flour, dip it in the egg, then cover each side thickly in panko.
  4. Heat oil in pan until a bead of water flicked on it causes it to sizzle loudly. Using tongs, lay each chicken breast gently in the pan.
  5. Cooking time is going to vary based on thickness of chicken. I cooked mine for 4 minutes each side.